Welcome to the Land of Shoddy Workmanship. If we can build it for less in order to sell it for less, you'll find it here.
Remnants. Sweet, near-valueless remanants. No, seriously, who has "bits of old leather" on their shopping list?
A great way to lose the remaining three you still have is to install this sign. JO-ANN makes it EASY.
Fons & Porter. Ask for it by name. I dare you.
The magic is making your money disappear from your wallet into their till by buying these. Zing!
Just because your artistic talent peaked at 3 years of age, that does not mean you can't go on to become a creator of fabric designs for people who don't have the energy to cut out a bunch of of smooch fabrics into the shape of a really badly drawn plane.
In case you were in any doubt that the key demographic for this store was "one step away from the grave"
"Phew! That rayon is really overpowering. I should open a window or something but i'm too lazy. Plus trying to cut out this badly drawn plane from a variety of smooch fabrics has really drained me."
"FREEEwwwwnKKK."
Fool's Mate. As if it's even possible to humiliate the offspring of a Jo-Ann shopper any further.
Ripped. Still for sale. That's fine.
"All aboard the Skateboarders With Polio Express!"
It's kind of like the tip, only people pay to take this stuff home to put in their houses.
No comments:
Post a Comment